Post- Premature Menopause

After starting chemo, my menstrual cycle completely stopped. I was told it was Premature Menopause, a common side-effect of chemotherapy. Although it was a little strange at first, I began to think of my bout with Amenorrhea as a little perk of my breast cancer treatment. I mean, who wouldn't prefer to do without Mother Nature's monthly gift? It was one less thing to think about every month, and, if I had to deal with the weakness and nausea from chemotherapy on top of cramps, bloating and irritability, I probably would not be here to write this blog... Not getting my period was a GOOD thing in my opinion. That is, until I met HOT FLASHES for the first time.

If you have never experienced them before, hot flashes are intense and often inconvenient. I can remember being on the bus on my way to the office, right under the strongest A/C vent, and breaking out into the heaviest of sweats. Dripping, pouring sweat... out the clear blue. I was sure everyone was looking at me, poor little instantly soaked girl... I would often hop off the bus at the nearest stop, no matter how far away from the office I was. At least walking, I would have a reason for looking like a sweaty mess.

These hot flashes, like my vanished cycle, continued long after chemotherapy ended. I never once missed Aunt Flo. I imagined, not counting all the other negative lasting side effects, that this is what life must be like in those tampon commercials where the subject is enjoying every possible aspect of spontaneous life. What? Me worry? I learned to deal with my hot flashes, from recognizing the initial tingle that would spread like a slow fire, to carrying paper towels in my purse. If I never knew it about myself before, I learned that I am very good at adapting to situations. Life continued on, past surgery, past radiation treatments, through my recovery. Then one day, 11 months later, Aunt Flo came back. Same day as my usual cycle, like she had never been away in the first place. The difference was that it seemed that everything I 'd been missing all those months had accumulated into a tsunami. Fantastic. The day she returned was two days before I decided to take a well deserved vacation. Rats. Oh well. 11 months without, and I felt like I was just learning how to deal with a period! On the upside though, the hot flashes stopped when Aunt Flo came back. Yay!

Because the type of cancer I had was fueled by my body's natural estrogen production, my medical oncologist feels that I would benefit from having my ovaries either suppressed, or, ultimately, removed. Side effects? AMENORRHEA, infertility, weight gain, HOT FLASHES... I need a minute to think...